Just Drawing What You See

It would appear that there comes a point in the flow of an artist's work when things are not as coherent as they used to be.  The ideas don't come as easily as they used to.

For pretty much all of the time that I've been drawing, it's been my habit to try and put together composites of sorts that I find aesthetically pleasing in some way or another.  But the last few drawings that I've produced, that have been composites of the sort I've been in the habit of putting together, have fallen kind of short of the mark.  It's been my wish to produce at least one more piece of work that could get the same kind of admiration that some of my work has gotten in the past.  But, it would appear that such is not going to be the case.

Now, I'm not too bent out of shape about this.  In fact, I'm not very shaken up about it at all.  I'm still feeling the urge to draw, but, the kind of certainty that I used to feel about it isn't there.  I'm kind of getting the urge to let go of the more "abstract" ideas about the kind of work I wanted to produce.  Any serious work I put out now, and perhaps later, is going to be more along the lines of simple work.  Little or no embellishment or decoration.  Nothing too fancy, just the basic elements in and of an image, whatever that image may be.  If I'm going to endeavor to produce a drawing that's "busy" enough to impress, my focus will be more about the indigenous details of a given subject, rather than the details I might "make up" around it.  Just concentrating on the beauty that's already there.  No more trying to manifest style and technique from other artists.  (All things considered, I haven't the skill to do that anyway.)  It's just about what I see, not what I can dream up.  (For most of it, at least.)

I guess there comes a time when you've just got to concentrate on what's there. 

Deceit Bathing In Ignorance

Years ago I was inspired to do a drawing that would remind me of the severity of a mistake I made and the importance of not repeating it. I wanted it to have as much impact as I could give it. I wanted to make it as realistic as I could. So, within the scope of my abilities, I knew that the highest level of realism I could achieve could only be reached by making it a composite drawing. The inspiration hit me while I was wallowing in despair from the consequences of my bad judgment. I found myself in possession of images that spoke to the reasons for my despair in a way perfectly suited to my sense of expression. The lighting in each of the images fit them together quite well. Though the composite image itself was quite surreal, the appearance of the drawing was as realistic as I could make it. Once it was complete, I could see in my mind's eye the surrounding environment. So, I set it behind the composite image and drew a circular frame around both.

As the drawing in its entirety is merely an expression of thought and feeling, I didn't try to keep the drawing consistent with spatial reality. In fact, from the very beginning, it was my intention to disregard the laws of physics and spatial realism. The things I wanted to represent in this picture are generally considered to be abstract concepts. So, I thought that the way I chose to depict things was appropriate. Especially since my deepest motivation for drawing this picture was quite self-centered. I take for myself the title of "artist" only because others apply it to me. I never really considered myself much of an artist. One of the reasons being that, in my work, I never really attempted to portray or relay any kind of message or tell any kind of story. Until now. But, this message was for me and me alone. And I had no intention of sharing what that message was in any great detail with anyone outside of a certain personal circle. At my first opportunity I had this drawing matted and framed. It's the only drawing currently in my possession that is. For me, this drawing serves as a personal reminder of a place I never want to go again.